Cook or soak the chow mein noodles according to their type, then rinse under cold water and drain thoroughly.
Whisk the light soy sauce, dark soy sauce, oyster sauce, sesame oil, sugar, pepper, and water in a small bowl.
Heat 1 tablespoon of oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Pan-fry the noodles for 2 to 3 minutes until lightly golden and crisp, then transfer them to a plate.
Add the remaining oil and cook the garlic for 10 seconds until fragrant.
Add the cabbage and carrot. Stir-fry for 1 to 2 minutes, until the cabbage begins to soften but remains crisp.
Add the bean sprouts and white parts of the green onions. Cook for 30 seconds.
Return the noodles to the pan, pour in the sauce, and toss for 1 to 2 minutes until coated and glossy.
Turn off the heat, stir in the green onion tops, and serve immediately.